Breathe. It’s understandable that your child is tense. . As the school year comes to an end, the pressure rises. Test weeks, final exams, full schedules — and minds that can feel just as full. Exam stress appears in many ways: sometimes visible, sometimes quietly beneath the surface. As a parent or caregiver, you want to offer support. To bring peace. To find the words that comfort.
We often fall back on a familiar, well-intentioned phrase: “It will be alright.” But those very words can be counterproductive.
Why “it’ll be okay” backfires
During times of stress, the brain works differently. So “you’ll be fine” can sound to an exhausted teenager like “don’t make such a fuss.” No recognition. No space for what they truly feel. Yet that’s exactly what young people need at this stage: understanding, acknowledgment, and room to take their own feelings seriously
So what do you say? Here are 10 phrases you can use as a parent, friend, or teacher to offer support during exam time:
1. What helps you find some peace this week?
By asking this question, you show that you’re thinking along. You offer space without taking charge.
2. Do you want to do something else for a while or just nothing at all?
Sometimes distraction is just what someone needs. A break, without the pressure to perform. Just being, together or alone.
3. I believe in you, but I also know this is tough
This sentence combines trust with recognition. It shows that you take someone seriously without downplaying them.
4. Shall we go for a walk, cycle or get a snack together?
Doing something together doesn’t have to be a big deal. Just having someone else around can help relieve tension.
5. Feel like venting? Feel free to complain.
Complaining is okay. Expressing stress is healthy. And sometimes, a little grumbling is just what gives you relief.
6. You are more than just your grades
An important reminder that young people should hear more often: Who you are goes beyond your diploma.
7. What do you need from me today?
Give the other person control. This shows that you’re there on their terms.
8. I might not know what you’re going through, but I’m here for you
Honest words often resonate most deeply. You don’t have to understand to offer support.
9. Should we do something fun after the exams?
Looking ahead helps you escape the tension of the present moment. Something to look forward to is reassuring.
10. You don’t have to do it perfectly, you’re already trying so hard
For young people who want to do everything right, this is a calming message. Good enough is also good 💚
Sometimes it helps to talk outside your own circle or bubble
At @ease, you can share your story with trained peers in a safe space. No judgment, no file—just take a deep breath. Online or in one of our drop-in living rooms.